Probably, like most up in here (hey don’t take it personally bro, EGO remember…) you still act and behave out of FEAR. Funny thing is most don’t even realise that their actions are a byproduct of FEAR.
It’s good when you first start to express yourself to random strangers to have a couple of lines that you can experiment around with to see how you feel, like when you get that first smile or the first weird look. A lot will happen and there will be a lot of emotions rising to the surface, all where you can practice to deal with it without labeling it nor let it influence your actions.
Then when you’re comfortable talking and expressing yourself to random people, it’s time to go fully you and express whatever feels right for YOU. By now you should already know if a pretty girl declines your invitation you will be still alive the next day in order to talk to the next hottie.
If you realise that you are being sucked into the rabbit hole of gaining POWER just to manipulate women into your bed, then be aware of this so you can put it on hold to stop this behaviour for good.
Charlie Chaplin said : “You need Power,
only when you want
to do something harmful
Love is enough to get everything done.”
I know you’re afraid whether or not YOU’RE enough right now as the person that you are.
I know you’re afraid about whether or not she likes your eccentricity.
I know you’re afraid about whether or not you’re going to creep her out.
I know you’re afraid of not knowing what will happen when you let go of controlling the situation with everything they have taught you.
I know you’re afraid of not knowing how you will feel in a certain situation that you are unprepared for.
Are you also talking somewhere in the lines like this: “I OPENED that 2 SET over there, I could see they were having fun and I wanted to join their party, after talking with them for a while they left because my WINGMAN fucked it up with his tense, needy behaviour I think, it was to early to PULL them because it was not PULL O’CLOCK, Sounds familiar?
Great, do you also see how FEAR based this mindset is and in what kind of a reality you live in?This is how you get tricked to believe you NEED the techniques to get better with women.
First, see how FEAR has taken complete control over you if this is your reality. YOU go out for the sole purpose to TAKE in order to fill the hole that causes the pain you’re feeling. Only to find out many years from now that you got addicted and it has become a drug for you. To go hunt for pussy. You want to learn all the techniques to have fast results so the pain will stop. And yes it stops, for a while. Then it’s there again. Putting a bandage over a bandage, however the wound keeps on bleeding. Find the courage to open the wound, stick your hands inside and pull out the core of what is causing that bleeding. Then it will heal and you find peace.
How long are you going to run away from your shade, only to find out you can’t run from it. It will always be there. No matter how hard you try or how fast you can run.
First you have to ACCEPT in order to let real change happen. If you don’t ACCEPT that it is there, how are you going to be able to do something about it?
ACCEPT everything about yourself. Even the fact that you’re bad with yourself and with women. Don’t do it as a technique. Whenever you have a strong feeling that is unpleasant, be with it and create the space around it that is your consciousness. You become aware of the thought that created the feeling and you just observe it. YOU don’t label it as GOOD or BAD. Observe, that’s your only task. Observe how long it will be there. The moment you truly ACCEPT what is, is the moment it will also go away. The world is in constant CHANGE, so will your emotions. How fast is up to you.
You can’t force it. It’s not like you close your eyes and you repeat a mantra for yourself “I ACCEPT, I ACCEPT, I ACCEPT,” no. Close your eyes, observe it to know and tell yourself that it’s OK. Be there for yourself. The more you LOVE yourself the more that will reflect into your outer world. This is where the real healing will take place.
Does this mean you have to wear dreadlocks from now on, don’t shave your armpits and wear “Flower power” clothes? No, that’s not what I mean.
You can still show your masculinity and lead in a manly way. However, you will do it with respect. You respect the time of the opposite sex. Not just your own agenda.
You’re not afraid anymore to express yourself. Everything that arises within yourself, you are OK with. You know you are the cause of that, not her. The only one you’re going to point that little naughty finger too is yourself. The more you heal from the inside the more it will manifest outside which people will pick up on.
YOU feel complete as you’ve learned how to deal with everything that comes along with it. Not some quick fixes! The women in your life are just a BONUS. You’re still going to make your penis wet, only difference here is that it is out of LOVE and mutual RESPECT. Not with some installed fear based mindsets and tricks.
YOU love them and find them desirable which you express unapologetic. FEAR has turned into LOVE. All we ever have is this moment HERE and NOW. And the decisions we make in this moment which are either based in FEAR or LOVE. Choose your own!
Although I’m in Bangkok right now, I do have to remind you about my Skype coaching package. To see if it’s something for you I advice you to make use of the 15 minute FREE Skype consultation. Where you can almost ask me anything. Don’t be afraid to pm me, now that you’re a LOVING self-actualised man and know how to cope with FEAR.